Laura Goldberg

Laura Goldberg

Monday, August 23, 2010

3.5 years?

What does it mean when I walk into my bathroom and there is a broken mirror on my rug that I didn't actual drop?

Thursday, August 12, 2010

If you can dream, you can pee.

I have had the same dream for awhile now. It's hard to know exactly how long this has been going on. It seems for the past month, I seem to have this dream a lot. Basically, no matter what the dream is about I always end up running to my bed to pee. In the dream I know that I should just go to the toilet but instead I have to pee in my bed.

I've looked up some analysis on least the urination part and I like what I see.

"To urinate, as well as to defecate, in a dream is usually related to removing all that is wrong, unnecessary, excessive or not wanted in your waking life. All negative external or internal factors which keep you from achieving an emotional balance must be eliminated from your life - just like urine, which is naturally removed in order to cleanse, purify and detoxify your body.

Dreams of urination may also stand for changes, usually for the better, to follow in one's waking life. They may also illustrate one's determination to let go of a painful past and adopt a new lifestyle, changing one's old habits and way of thinking. Consequently, urination dreams may be a symbol for re-birth and revival. "

So basically I am letting go of all the negative in my life and jumping in my bed to do this. Let's not even go there right now why I am symbolically doing this in my bed.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

This is why I will forever be single I think...this is an actual profile on okcupid.

i am a [[transgender]] bibliophiliac [[lesbian]]. (as a [[transdyke]], i am uninterested in dating men, so stop right here, loverboy.)
i am shy but enthusiastic, [[linguist]]ically-oriented, [[feminist]], [[imaginative]] and an exceedingly well traveled homebody. i have a sense of humour inherited from my [[irish-american]] father's side of the family: coarse, strong, but loving. i'm not afraid of showing affection and i stand up for my friends and family something fierce.

these profiles are so undemonstrative of our true personalities. maybe if you think i'm interesting, we should just talk. i don't know what to say on these things; it's hard to find the right words.

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE HELL A TRANSGENDER BIBLIOPHILIAC LESBIAN TRANSDYKE IS!? I seriously don't even know if this is a woman or a man. I think a woman but am I wrong?  If I can't figure out what is under the sheets so to speak before I even read the profile, I'm pretty sure I should just move on to the next.

And what's up with everyone on okcupid being "bi".  Can't a woman just commit to being gay.  Just say you are gay. If you want to fuck a guy later that's fine, just commit when making a profile. 

Stop me in my tracks

Occasionally I will hear a song and it will just stop me in my tracks on what I am thinking about..and most likely overthinking about and just make me really happy and really hopeful.  Matt Nathanson's song "Come on Get Higher" does just that.  My opinions about dating have again taken a different turn the last couple of weeks and I am feeling more and more calm about things just naturally falling into place one day.  With each day and each date or girl, I am learning more and more what makes me tick, and what makes me tock.  (And I don't necesarrily love the tocking.)  My recovery period has been off the charts and I'm pretty stoked about that. 

However, I do sometimes get emotional and sensitive and romantic and this song describes how I felt today in the car.  There is one line in this song that pretty much sums up what I want someone to feel about me.  I'll let you figure out which line it is. 

I miss the sound of your voice
And I miss the rush of your skin
And I miss the still of the silence
As you breathe out and I breathe in

If I could walk on water, If I could tell you what’s next
Make you believe, make you forget
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love

I miss the sound of your voice
The loudest thing in my head
And I ache to remember
All the violent, sweet,
perfect words that you said